Ole Ole Ole Ole...Feeling Hot, Hot, Hot

For the first time, I took hot yoga or as others would call Bikram. I was pretty excited about trying something new since I'm a very active individual. When my co-worker invited me to try hot yoga I was a little hesitant, but I figured what the heck! She told me exactly what I needed to bring for this new exercise activity (what a great excuse to buy an aquamarine mat and a matching headband at Lululemon).

I knew it was going to be a very warm room, but I was not mentally prepared for 1 & 1/2 hours of poses in 105 F degrees. I have to admit at the 45 minute mark I was exhausted and wet from swimming in my own perspiration! Thank goodness I was told not to wear shorts since some of the poses require holding yourself by your knees or calves. Talk about slippery skin (I felt like a salamander which are scaleless and aquatic. The word is also defined as a "mythical being, esp. a lizard or other reptile, thought to be able to live in fire").

At the office, before my co-worker and I headed to yoga, I kept telling her "I'm going to try to make you laugh while we're in there!" I'm quite the personality so I wasn't sure I could handle the quietness of such a disciplined practice. My devious "laughter" plan was foiled when I realized I needed to focus under the extreme heat!

During one of the poses where I laid face down on the mat, I was visited by a lovely dark eight legged creature making his or her way towards me! HOLY CRAP!!! I seriously had to take all the energy inside of me not to scream (in actuality, I needed to channel that energy to give my co-worker the evil eye)! I quickly calmed myself down, took in some air and used the power of my breath to blow that spider off my mat! By the sound of my breathing technique, I'm sure the others around me thought I was very deep into my stance or I was going into labor! When my "I'll-huff-and-I'll-puff-and-I'll-blow-your-house-in" method did not work, I had to figure out what else to do! It was in that moment where I would have preferred to switch out my "third eye" for a "third hand" because I had to quicly flick the spider instead (don't worry creature lovers, he lived). Later in the session, I noticed the guy in front of me flicking something of his towel (creature lovers, I have no idea if the spider lived, sorry)! When class was over I thought to myself, "I would rather have a yummy hoagie than be a yogi!"

"I tried yoga once but took off for the 

mall halfway through class, 

as I had a sudden craving for 

a soft pretzel and world peace."

- Terri Guillemets